Things Boys Do // Can We Not (thursday thursday thursday)

It's Thurssday, Thursssssday, gonna get down on Thursday!  And with that, my last blog post ever is concluded, because I'm a Youtube sensation now and I'm on to bigger and better things.   Jk, and also jk about it being Thursday, because I wrote this on Thursday but it'sclearly not Thursday anymore.   But, if we pretend that it is Thursday, that would make it time for some #canwenots, right?  Right.  Today's #canwenots are focused on the male half of the population because, well. . . let's just say that there was one too many farting incidents on Monday and I'm taking it out on my blog.  Guys, just a few things that I could live without.

Thinking farting is hilarious.  I have news for you: it's gross.  It smells bad.  It sounds bad.  And, even if it were not remotely repulsive, it definitely would still not warrant 20-minute laughing fits.  #canwenot

Asking girls if they are sick/tired.  I mean, if I really was sick or tired, I'd probably be really touched that you cared enough to ask.  However, I'm usually not.  Most of the time, I'm just unpretty and don't want to be reminded of it.  Gentlemen, it's probably safer to just not ask. #canwenot

Taking up the whole entire bathroom (looking at you, Dad and Jonah.)  I mean, what are you even doing in there?  I could probably do your hair with my eyes closed, so you should definitely be able to take care of that somewhere other than the bathroom.  The nerve.  #canwenot



Eating all of the food.  My brother has recently become a teenager, and I've since learned that teenage boys can eat an inordinate amount of food.  I mean, I feel like we could feed myself and five friends with the food that my brother eats by himself.  Speaking of which, why does he not weigh three hundred pounds?  I love my brother and I don't want him to be obese, but he deserves to be fat and he's not and it isn't fair.  #canwenot



Touching everything.  Hitting ponytails and taking my stuff and sticking tape to my sweaterm. Mine.  Guys, it's really not cute anymore, if it ever was.  (Disclaimer: Zac Efron, you may tape my sweater any day.)  Hugging waayyyyy more aggressively than is necessary (coughcoughJonahandDadcoughcough.)  And, evil of all evils, tickling.  Being tickled makes me feel like I'm dying or being tortured and so I don't really like it, surprisingly enough. #canwenot

To avoid alienating every male that ever happens across this space (although, let's be honest, how many guys read blogs?) and because I don't feel like I've been completely fair, let's talk about the stuff that boys/men do that are extremely helpful.

Bug killing.  Any girl who is a strong, independent woman who don't need no man: 1) you go! 2) but you probably wouldn't mind having someone to kill a bug every once in a while, right?  Especially those disgusting, purely evul things with 4839583 LONG legs that have been known to fall out of the ceiling.  I don't know about you, but I'm not dying to deal with that all by myself.  #guysftw

Reaching stuff that's just a leeeettle too high.  I'm not short, but when my waterbottle is on a ledge that's way out of range, I can usually count on a guy being tall enough to help me out. (Even if it's the same guy who put it up there in the first place - see the #canwenots!) #guysftw


Laughing at things that aren't even funny.  (As long as it's not farting, because yuuucccck.) Yes, please do laugh at my terrible knock knock joke or even something I say that wasn't necessarily supposed to be funny.  Either way, it'll make it easier for me to pretend that I'm a comedic genius, and that's always cool.  #guysftw

Doing things that most girls would never, ever, not in a million years, do.  I don't really want to jump off a building or spray tan myself orange when I lose a bet,  but watching someone else do it is almost as good.  #guysftw

This is normally a link up, but I'm not on top of things sooooo . . it isn't.  Next Thursday, thought, it'll be here!  Write up your own list of #canwenots and bring it here!

Allie

Ice Cream Hangover & Cold Showers // #CanWeNot

Hey you guys!  Today's the day - the #CanWeNot linkup is officially going live!  No longer do you have to sit back and let Nina and I have all the fun - you get to participate this week, too. That, and you get to meet a bunch of other bloggers who are ranting about their #canwenot moments, and who doesn't want to do that?  I think that last sentence was a logical fallacy, but if it gets you to try this link up than it's cool, right?  #CanWeNot is basically a great big girl talk minus the half-gallon of ice cream and spoons.  Come to think of it, maybe we need to find a way to incorporate half gallons of ice cream. Or just gallons. Yes?

Anyway, since you're going to be participating in #CanWeNot from now until death do us part, you're going to need to know how this works!

1.  Write a post including all of your #CanWeNot moments from the week.  (For examples of #CanWeNot moments, see below.)

2. Make sure to link back to Nina's #CanWeNot post for that day or mine so that you can connect with the rest of the link up. You can do that by simply adding a link that connects to one of our blogs in your post or grabbing this button to add.

3.  Add your link to the gadget at the end of this post to participate and let a bunch of other people read what you have to say.

4.Take a few minutes to read the other posts and meet some fellow bloggers - so fun!

Without further ado, my #CanWeNots for the week:

When my dog pooped on the floor of my room.  More accurately, he pooped on my clothes that were on my floor.  I don't know if you guys have ever woken up to the smell of dog poop, but I wouldn't recommend it.  I would recommend instead getting a nice crate with a humongous lock on it and locking your dog in it all night.  Watch out, Eddie.  #canwenot

Then there was the time that my shower at school didn't bother producing hot water until I was rinsing the conditioner out of my hair.  Only slightly worse than being being sweaty longer than necessary is attempting to get clean in a cold shower.   #canwenot

Also, there was the time that I lost my self control and ate way more spoonfuls of chocolate moose tracks straight out of the container than I should have WITH THE HELP OF FRIENDS WITH THE HELP OF FRIENDS I promise I didn't eat the whole half gallon completely by myself.  But yeah anyway that one didn't really become a #canwenot until the next morning when I felt like I was going to die. Feeling like you're dying unnecessarily is definitely a #canwenot.

This morning, I tried to ice my knee on the way to school, because it hurt and I needed relief.  Actually, I succeeded in icing it.  The trouble started when I put the bag of ice in my gym bag with plans to throw it away once I got into the building.  And then the trouble worsened when I forgot about it.  When the ice decided to go and melt, getting my practice clothes and volleyball shoes soaked through, things were downright tragic.  So, I'm not sure if this #canwenot is to the ice for doing what it physically had to do or to myself for forgetting about it. Let's blame the ice.  #canwenot, ice?  Forreal. Gosh.

To this sock that is on my left foot and has a hole right where my big toe is, resulting in a very cold big toe that keeps slipping out through the hole and making me very uncomfortable.  Not to mention that my foot looks like a hobo foot.  #canwenot.

Speaking of uncomfortable, can we talk about that permanent wedgie I had during volleyball practice today?  Why do wedgies even need to happen, ever? #canwenot.

Losing, as in volleyball games.  I'm competitive, and so losing is not fun for me and I'd really prefer not to.  In addition, not making mistakes would be beyond fabulous.  #canwenot?

A couple days ago, I woke up to some really pretty, soothing music.  "Oh, that's nice! My phone decide to play lullabies to me at 5:00 AM!  I can definitely sleep to this!"  It wasn't until I woke up again, this time around 6:30, that I realized that that soothing music had been my alarm.  Also, that I had half an hour to shower and get ready for school. #canwenot.

How about those hand spasms? Like the one I had today that sent my smoothie cup and all its contents into a mess on the counter just as I had finished adding the last ingredient.  Is this something I should see a doctor about?  I would love to be able to make my smoothies on the first try.  #canwenot.

Does anyone else have extremely sensitive ears?  Like, when you go running and it's colder than sixty degrees and your ears are exposed they almost freeze off?  And if they don't freeze off they just hurt really, really badly? No?  Well, I have those, and if I could change one thing about my body . . . well, sorry ears.  But you'd be the first to go.  Since I'm probably never going to have that option, though . . . #canwenot?

And that's all she wrote. Literally.

Allie

P.S. What are your #canwenot moments from this week?

P.S. again:  My link up tool isn't working, so go link up with Nina! Go go go!

.....

#CanWeNot // Link-Up Announcement

I could write an intro that eases you into this post and then introduces the topic, all while getting you excited about what you're going to read, or I could just get right to it.  Ding ding ding, get right to it wins!

I'm going to cohost a link-up, you guys!  IT IS SO EXCITING! It's called #CanWeNot, and it's basically a list of complaints about things we could do without.  The idea all started with this post from my fabulous link-up cohost, Nina!  I left her a comment about how #CanWeNot needed to become a weekly thing, preferrably a link-up so I could participate.  Less than a month later, we're getting ready to launch a weekly #CanWeNot link-up, and I could not be more excited!  Here's how you can participate. 

1.  Write a post with all of your #CanWeNot moments of the week.  (A #CanWeNot moment is defined as any time you were mildly annoyed with something and wished it wasn't happening.  Long line at Starbucks?  Men wearing really short shorts that expose their thighs?  Perfect material. Especially the man thighs, because that's disgusting and unnatural.) Bonus points for adding pictures.  (However, if there are pictures of man thighs I refuse to read your post.  I'm sorry.)

2.  Add the button below to your post, or include a link to Nina's post or mine for that day in your post.  That way, people who read your #CanWeNot post and love it can read more or participate for themselves! Let's say post a few more times.  

3.  Join us in our (good-natured) complaining every Thursday by adding your link on the #CanWeNot post for that day on Nina's blog or right here on mine. 

4.  Spread the love! Read, laugh at, and comment on some of the other posts in the link up.  Maybe you'll meet a blog friend who was annoyed by the same thing you were - total bonding moment.  

That being said, here are my #CanWeNot moments from the week.  

To the shopping cart that rolled out in front of my moving car and tried to cause me to get into an accident and die or raise my insurance higher than it already is or lose my driver's license or have a heart attack or all of the above. #canwenot

To the zit that showed up to the middle of my forehead completely uninvited and proceeded to attract an inordinate amount of attention to itself.  Was that completely necessary?  I mean, you couldn't have moved in behind my hairline where no one would notice you?  Or, I don't know, NOT AT ALL?  No one even likes you.  #canwenot

To the people who decided that non-iPhones can't do emojis.  I mean, it was a smart marketing move for Apple because I would definitely buy an iPhone again just for emojis and group chat.  But seriously?  Is one little smiley cat face too much to ask? #canwenot

To my sweat glands, which are extremely overactive.  You guys can really chill out, because I don't need to sweat when I'm just sitting there in class.  I really don't.  I promise that you can just leave me alone and I will find myself another way to not overheat and stay alive.  #canwenot

To the leggings I'm wearing, which apparently have a hole in the crotch that they didn't feel like telling me about until I had left the house.  At least I'm wearing really cute neon striped underwear. Right?  But next time, #canwenot

To my five dollar fake Toms, which give me blisters.  Why, oh why?  You were the best quality that Five Below has to offer, and my feet are suffering the consequences and I have to use like eight Bandaids per foot.  Show me that logic.  #canwenot

Aaannndd, looking back this post definitely could be renamed, "Gross things that happen to my body." I know, I know.  #canwenot. 

Thanks for showing up! Don't forget to link up next week with your own #CanWeNot post!

Sweatily yours,

Allie